Yucky lymph nodes

Today was the day we were supposed to meet with the surgeon. The day we were supposed to talk about the surgery. Schedule the surgery. Plan for the surgery. And today was the day we were supposed to go home.

The day started early when we checked in at 7:00 a.m. for Take #2 of the Endoscopic Ultrasound/Endoscopy/Fine Needle Aspiration or whatever else you want to call it. E.'s day of starvation paid off and since there was no food in his tummy, they were able to continue with the procedure. Once we had the preliminary report in hand, we headed to the Thoracic Center to meet with the surgeon. Since our appointment was originally scheduled at 8:00 a.m. and we obviously didn't make that, they were just going to "squeeze" us in. The front desk did inform us that the surgeon wanted to go home early today, so that was good news for us in terms of probable wait time. So, we sat and waited. And sat and waited. And sat and waited some more. I joked that maybe the surgeon usually went home at 9:00 p.m., and by going home early, he meant he was going home at 7:00 p.m. instead. I think the joke was on me. At 3:45 p.m., they finally called us in to a room. At 4:45 p.m., the nurse practioner came in. And finally, well after 5:30 p.m., we met with the surgeon.

Although we were frustrated with the long wait, I do have to give the nurse practioner and the surgeon kudos for being well informed about E.'s case. There weren't the routine questions about his health history, symptoms, etc. that we seem to answer at every, single appointment. They had obviously read his file. They knew his case. They reviewed a couple of key points and that was it. E.'s case had been already presented to the board and it was agreed that he would most likely be a surgical candidate.

But . . . the lymph nodes are concerning. There are some lymph nodes in the lower esophagus/upper stomach region, as well as some lymph nodes in the chest area. There is also that celiac lymph node that tested positive that we already knew about. All that is workable. All that does not eliminate the possibility of surgery. But . . . another but . . . there is a upper clavicle lymph node (by the right shoulder) that could change everything. If that lymph node is positive, then surgery is no longer a consideration. A positive lymph node in that area would mean that the cancer has metastisized to other areas of the body and surgery wouldn't be beneficial.

E. now has a series of new appointments. He'll undergo more tests, including an ultrasound with a fine needle aspiration of that clavicle lymph node (using an ultrasound picture, they'll insert a long needle into the collar bone area of his right shoulder and draw out some tissue to biopsy). I'm praying with all my might that it comes back negative and we can meet with the surgeon to discuss surgery after all. If it is positive, we'll meet with the oncologist again to determine another course of treatment of chemotherapy and possibly radiation.

So, we changed our flight reservations, extended our rental car and checked back into a hotel. We'll be here at least another week. And then we'll go from there.

We're trying really really hard to stay positive. But I'd be lying if I said this didn't scare the crap out of me. Prayers and positive vibes would sure be appreciated about now.

S.